tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717Sat, 02 Jun 2012 17:13:42 +0000bloggySmoltzTwittercfsX-FilesAwardgraduationUnsung LullabiesquoteAlexinfertilitygardenHarry Potterwoman1 YearBuddhist Stuffmy familyadenoetsyhopeexcisionTimsick boxsurgeryGeorge Harrisonfamily historyendoangerYasmindatinggratefulworkAeroadoptionfriendshumorlotusHolidayspicstherapyDoctor WhobaseballBYDLSstaphvideo gamesSavellasurrogacyICLWGodtattooinvisible illnessFollow FridayblanketsWordless WednesdaydepressionletterPHPTom Pettynarcissistic injurydreamsneuroswimmingoophorectomybook review2 yearPTpainreproductive storypsychLexapro3 Yearsinusessupport groupGiveawayhysterectomyFathers DayM*A*S*HStar TrekfibroMothers Dayendo awarenessI have Endometriosis & Fibromyalgia. My Adenomyosis was cured by a hysterectomy, which left more scars than just visible ones. I'm a proud cat mom. I'm a M*A*S*H, Tom Petty & Star Trek fan, and also a blanket maker.http://www.mudandlotus.com/noreply@blogger.com (Sonja)Blogger639125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-1807709951127371163Mon, 28 May 2012 01:14:00 +00002012-05-27T20:15:09.710-05:00hysterectomyTiminfertilityToday I watched the Star Trek Deep Space 9 episode "Tears of the Prophets." In this episode, Jadzia and Worf are talking about having a baby.  Later in the episode, Jadzia lays in the Infirmary dying, looks at her husband Worf, and says, "We would have made a beautiful baby." I started to cry. Why? Because Tim and I would have made beautiful babies. I haven't been writing here on this blog http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/05/tears-of.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-2589585230630174111Fri, 25 May 2012 16:13:00 +00002012-05-25T11:13:01.068-05:00endohysterectomyTimexcisioninfertilityendo awarenessHere is the link to the podcast of the radio show Tim and I did about endometriosis and infertility.  Thanks to Resonance 104.4 FM and Tim for allowing me to talk about endo!http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/05/podcast-is-up.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-2578875971347483548Thu, 24 May 2012 19:51:00 +00002012-05-25T22:16:22.035-05:00endohysterectomyTimadenoinfertilityThis week's "Technical Difficulties" on Resonance 104.4fm is the radio debut of "The Mud and The Lotus." Tim and I will talk about my endometriosis, infertility, the past ten years, and the path forward. Tune in at 3:30pm British Summer Time / 9:30am Central Time on Friday (5/25) on www.resonancefm.com around the world or 104.4 FM if you are in London. **Update 5/25 Here's the blog post http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/05/mud-and-lotus-on-radio.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-2964124525992184250Mon, 14 May 2012 05:29:00 +00002012-05-14T00:29:56.482-05:00hysterectomyTimMothers DayinfertilityAlex I've gotten better with Mother's Day over the years (last year, then in 2010).  This year, I've received cards from friends and also one from Tim.  I slept with it under my pillow last night.  It was a great comfort.  Alex threw a tantrum this morning while I took an epsom salt bath for my fibro.  Then periodically throughout the day she yelled at me (and Tim) to let her out front, which was http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/05/mothers-day-2012.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-748933791575158862Fri, 11 May 2012 04:55:00 +00002012-05-10T23:55:58.818-05:00TimPTmy familypain Me and Justin Last week during PT, whatever she did pissed off my upper abdomen.  It was a different pain than it had been (usually it's where my left ovary would have been) so I was concerned.  Over the weekend it never went away.  I was able to keep the pain at bay with meds and my TENS Unit.  I went to Eli's on Saturday night for some grilling, and I even made it to a baseball game with http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/05/pain-and-stuff.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-5545711651940213952Fri, 04 May 2012 02:37:00 +00002012-05-03T21:37:24.953-05:00TiminfertilityAlexOne of the subjects that Tim and I have spent quite some time talking about was my hysterectomy and the resulting infertility.  I knew it would be painful but it was something that he and I needed to talk about. There are very, very few people in this world that I have talked to about this stuff that deeply. And I haven't for a long, long time. My hysterectomy's emotional scars have been http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/05/its-only-broken-heart.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-8561643971621741597Thu, 03 May 2012 16:27:00 +00002012-05-03T11:27:07.669-05:00Wordless WednesdayAlex I missed Wordless Wednesday,but I hope this picture of Alex makes up for it! http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/05/alex.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-8369582565259094215Wed, 02 May 2012 02:25:00 +00002012-05-01T21:25:59.600-05:00TimAlexI hadn't updated on Alex since her surgery.  Her recovery went smoothly.  I only had to give her a few days of pain meds, and after the first night she was pretty much back to normal.  Alex got her stitches out yesterday.  The lump they removed was some kind of benign tumor.  The vet who did the surgery was gone yesterday, so the vet that took the stitches out could only find the others' http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/05/alex-is-doing-great.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-8505206149955765557Mon, 30 Apr 2012 01:57:00 +00002012-04-29T20:57:23.734-05:00endohysterectomyadenofriendsinfertilityendo awareness This speech was given by my bff Sara.  Please watch it.  Please share it. http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/04/unite-against-war-on-women.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-3215193770556448707Mon, 30 Apr 2012 01:33:00 +00002012-04-29T20:33:03.594-05:00TimHello, I’m Tim. I’m a spastic. Since my attitude to sex has already been reflected here, I feel happy to explain how I got there. Having Cerebral Palsy from birth, I could never get to sleep very quickly. So night-time was always mine, and self-satisfaction was a root to relaxation and therefore sleep. I pretty much had no faith in my body when I was a kid/early adult so it was a lot easier http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/04/guest-post-from-tim.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-1066872930485795439Wed, 25 Apr 2012 03:08:00 +00002012-04-24T22:08:27.169-05:00dreamshysterectomybaseballI had an infertility-related dream last night. In the dream, I was a housekeeper for this well-off couple.  They were trying to get pregnant.  I remember being led into a room where I was forced to watch the wife's ultrasound.  She was having a baby girl. I started tearing up, so I ran through the room.  I cried and cried as I ran. I don't remember much more of it.  I know Tim was somehow http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/04/infertility-dream.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-7987015704792901181Wed, 25 Apr 2012 02:31:00 +00002012-04-24T21:31:16.091-05:00TimpainI meant to write this last night, but my spoons ran out before I could. Anyway. This post could be considered TMI.  So you've been warned. So the other night, Sunday, Tim went to bed before I did, seeing as he's six hours ahead of me.  I actually then fell asleep on the couch for a little nap.  We both managed to wake up at the same time a few hours later.  We started texting, and after http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/04/spoonie-sexting.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-633245836478655974Sat, 21 Apr 2012 18:29:00 +00002012-04-21T13:29:57.949-05:00TimAlexAlex's surgery went perfectly fine. I dropped her off around 8:00 am Thursday.  I hated leaving her there.  I wish I could have stayed so when they put her under I was with her, and then when she woke up she would see me.  But that's not how it works.  So I got home, and thankfully Tim was texting with me so I didn't dwell on the fact that when I opened the door I didn't hear and see Alex cominghttp://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/04/alexs-surgery.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-6027323074750757824Sat, 21 Apr 2012 17:34:00 +00002012-04-21T12:34:08.691-05:00datingTimSo....I have a boyfriend. His name is Tim.  We had been Twitter friends for a while, chatting about health stuff or the Braves every so often.  We had also become Facebook friends. Lately, he's been stuck at home, and I'm at home also of course, so we started chatting about the Braves and then soon it led to pacifism, philosophy, our health history/challenges/how we've thrived, and before I http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/04/tim.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-5295060026603448136Sun, 08 Apr 2012 02:43:00 +00002012-04-07T21:43:42.776-05:00AlexThe last couple weeks, I noticed a bump on her head, behind her right ear.  I figured she might have bumped her head on something, so I wasn't too worried but kept my eye on it. A couple nights ago, I noticed that the bump turned into a lump.  I started getting worried.  The next morning I called the vet and made an appointment for that afternoon. My brave little one! I was pretty anxious.  http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/04/last-couple-weeks-i-noticed-bump-on-her.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-804429712458505534Fri, 30 Mar 2012 03:55:00 +00002012-03-29T22:55:28.339-05:00fibrosupport groupThings are going pretty well here. Yesterday (Weds) I had a little bit of a fibro flare.  I chalked it up to the stress of the breakup.  It wasn't too bad; I just rested with Alex while watching Netflix. The breakup:  I'm doing pretty good.  It only takes me a couple of days to get over a breakup.  My brother Eli came over Tuesday night after T came and picked up the rest of his stuff, and hunghttp://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/03/last-couple-days.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-9105119612645356439Wed, 28 Mar 2012 21:37:00 +00002012-03-28T16:38:41.468-05:00tattooWordless Wednesday Be here now. Flowers in the wind to represent that everything is in constant change. Flowers are connected to the words to symbolize that everything is connected. http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/03/wordless-weds-new-tattoo.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-7896430061179995706Tue, 27 Mar 2012 05:15:00 +00002012-03-27T00:15:03.700-05:00datingTonight Tabrez and I broke up. He didn't see a future for us, and has known for a few months now. So it's over. I'm okay.  I always am. I have Alex and a great support network.http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/03/break-up.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-2087620783801701625Sat, 24 Mar 2012 21:24:00 +00002012-03-24T16:25:17.774-05:00endoPTI went down to see my endo specialist Tuesday for an office visit. He's very pleased with the progress I'm making in pelvic PT.  He suggested that I drop my Danazol dose down, from one 200mg in the morning, two at night, to just one in the morning and one at night.  In about a month I should see if this is a good idea or a bad idea.  He thinks that things are adequately suppressed so we can try http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/03/endo-appt-report.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-3018300150326476969Tue, 13 Mar 2012 21:41:00 +00002012-03-14T00:00:21.657-05:00endohysterectomyfriendsendo awareness http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/03/scans-of-endo-article.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-417909854502166203Mon, 12 Mar 2012 04:52:00 +00002012-03-14T00:00:21.663-05:00endofriendsendo awarenessThe big news I promised.... My friend Sara and I gave an interview to our local paper about Endometriosis for Endo Awareness Month!! And here's the link! It all started when in late February I emailed the "She Says" part of the paper, saying that it was endometriosis awareness month and I would love to share my story.  That was it.  I didn't expect any reply.  They emailed back saying they http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/03/big-endo-news.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-8642714327386674754Fri, 09 Mar 2012 04:38:00 +00002012-03-08T22:38:24.740-06:00PTpain via Google Images I had pelvic PT yesterday.  She did all internal work.  We didn't use the TENS unit this time, so we could see what my pain levels really are. Today?  I felt like I got hit in the pelvis with a Romulan disruptor. My pelvic muscles are so freakin sore.  I've spent the day resting, icing, heating, and light stretching on my exercise ball. We hope that Dr. H will tell my http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/03/owwww.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-5239254465188831156Thu, 08 Mar 2012 00:08:00 +00002012-03-14T00:00:21.676-05:00endoendo awarenessThis video was made by the fabulous Barb!  This video shows the faces of endometriosis.  We are all beautiful women suffering from this horrible disease that robs us of so much.  Please take the time to view it. http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/03/march-2012-endometriosis-awareness.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-431489601725216451Sun, 04 Mar 2012 21:09:00 +00002012-03-14T00:00:21.669-05:00endoendo awareness via WeHeartIt.com It's March, which means it's Endometriosis Awareness Month! I know I'm a few days late.  Last week I was battling a bladder infection that made me feel so miserable and crabby, so I wasn't online much at all.  Then I spent a couple of days doing stuff and catching up on things and now I'm paying for it with pelvic pain. I updated My Endo Story. I'm going to have BIG endo http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/03/its-that-time-again.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5154678541607026717.post-8767416561110839185Wed, 22 Feb 2012 05:28:00 +00002012-04-23T11:22:24.204-05:00my familyinfertilityAlexMy grandma's memorial and funeral were really nice. At the memorial, I was able to meet friends of my grandma's that I had never met before.  Including a former professor of humanities, who also started the Women's Studies at the college my brother graduated from.  She and I talked for quite a while, about the war on women, how writing things helps during difficult times, and how to feel useful.http://www.mudandlotus.com/2012/02/observations-at-funeral.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Sonja)3